Trans-mission Partnerships

Postcard from Romania

In November 2005, I met Peter Malkin, the founder of the Charity known as ‘Trans-mission’. We met to discuss the possibility of young people on orders to the Youth Offending Team doing some kind of project which would help the beneficiaries of Peter’s charity,whilst at the same time increasing their skills and broadening their understanding of other cultures.

Peter brought along a video to give us a flavour of the type of work he does. The video, entitled ‘On a Wing and a Prayer’ showed how he had linked with other local people in Warwickshire to take aid to a town in Ukraine. The video had a big impact on me and I have since shown it to a number of other people with much the same effect.

The video shows terrible conditions in a hospital and orphanage in a town in Ukraine. The laundry from hell, decrepit washing machines washing bed linen which would be better described as rags. The X-Ray department ancient machinery fit only for the scrap yard.

In the ward for the new born babies there is a row of 10 plastic cribs. 10 babies, wrapped tightly in white blankets, each with a luggage label pinned to them. The paint on the walls of the ward is peeling, the windows are broken and there is one nurse who appears to know little of what becomes of the children when they leave her care. The babies don’t cry for any attention. We are told they are separated from their mothers at birth ‘as there is no possibility for them to be together’.

The scene changes to a church where local people are praying for help. Their leader is passionate and desperate, the congregation showing little sign that they expect any results from their prayers.

Other scenes show children in the streets doing nothing very much because there is nothing much to do. They look cold and scruffy, hungry and dejected.

Every day on the news we see tragedy, pain and suffering and I don’t know any-one who does not give generously to charities. But this video left me with the idea that a small amount of help could make a huge amount of difference.

I invited any-one who might be interested in helping to meet up, watch the video and discuss possible ideas for helping. 11 people came along and everyone wanted to help. I talked to other friends and colleagues and they helped too. We had all kinds of ideas about what might be possible, but we had not reckoned on European Laws standing in our way.

There is a story that a man was walking along a beach where thousands of starfish had been washed up and were unable to get back into the sea. He saw a man pick up a starfish and throw it back into the sea. He said to him.. ”You want to give that up mate – it won’t make any difference.” To which came the reply “Tell that to the starfish I have just thrown back”.

I think this is the same principle that underpins Peter’s work. He has no illusions that he can change the world but just by showing others real situations, he motivates individuals to try to make a difference. He does this without funding. He gave his own job up to concentrate on this work but in order to fund his trips he works as a driver, then as soon as he has enough to fund his own trip he is off again. It seems there is always some-one he has inspired wanting to go with him, paying for their own trip, taking time off work to do it and getting others involved too. I had known Peter for a total of 5 hours only before I went to Romania with him – crazy or what?

I had no intention of going to Romania in January but in the end agreed to go because Peter convinced me that if I saw things for myself I would be better placed to see what could be done to help. This is a risky strategy because it is very easy to be overwhelmed by the problems and feel that the small difference isn’t worth the effort especially with the demands in our own personal lives. As I packed my bags to leave I was asking myself ‘how did I get myself into this?’ Many times whilst away I thought ‘what am I doing here?’ He was right- once you see what needs to be done you feel motivated to do something even if it will just be a drop in the ocean.. Pass me a starfish will you?

The first day was spent travelling from Luton to Budapest by air and then train to Jibou. We were met at the station by Nick and Nadia, a young couple who had agreed to put me up and to link me with other workers in Jibou.

Nick is English and a qualified teacher. He works with young people and adults in Jibou, doing all kinds of things including teaching English, setting up youth clubs and generally helping the local community. Wages are really low in Romania but the prices are rising all the time. Graduates are lucky if they earn the equivalent of £80 per month and to heat a tiny 4 roomed apartment you can expect to pay about £16 per month. Nadia is Romanian and gave up her job as a secretary to marry Nick . She also had to leave her local community and family which caused her a good deal of distress because family life is very important to Romanians. They were very pleased with their new home which they tell me was a great improvement on the apartment they had moved from. The new house had 4 rooms and a back room which they intend to convert into a youth facility. They had made their home really cosy, but to do so they had to have a log fire burning all night in their bedroom. The bathroom was so cold that my shampoo would not come out of the tube and ice is frequently to be found on the inside of the windows. They could be in England enjoying a very different lifestyle with wages more appropriate for skilled young people.

However, their main priority is to work with the young people, to give them some hope for the future, to help them develop skills to help them prepare for when Romania becomes part of the European Union. They want to inspire young people to become activists for their own future and for the future of Romania. Inspirational!

In England Peter had told me about several ‘lads’ who were active in this type of work. One of these lads was Daryl, who provided accommodation for Peter while I stayed with Nick and Nadia. This gave them an excellent opportunity to talk about football at great length. I was deeply saddened not to be able to join in the fun chats about Newcastle United but somehow I coped.

Our ‘lad’ Daryl is 41 years old, living on a very low wage, but totally dedicated to working with young people. Daryl was hoping that we might be able to help him with kit for his youth football team. He looks after a group of boys between the age of 11 and 16 who are very keen to play football but don’t have the kit and don’t have the money to pay for facilities to practice in the winter. I wanted to have a chat with the boys and find out their views on young people and offending. In the U.K. young people often tell us that they have offended because they are bored so I wanted to hear what the football team had to say.

We met up at the coffee shop. A nice little group turned up and presented me with the team photo. We bought them a drink and a bar of chocolate each which, Daryl told me would be a big treat. A couple of the lads refused to open their chocolate while we talked and Daryl told me later that it was because they would always share anything they had with their families. This might not seem a big deal, but to me it was such a contrast to the greed I often see.

I had taken 4 footballs, 2 pumps, some adaptors and a whistle as gifts for the team. Daryl explained that he would keep the balls so that any one of them could come to him and borrow one for the day, so that one boy would not be favoured over another. They were very excited because the balls had Coca-Cola on them and were a bit different. Of course, I now want to take them all a Coca-Cola football.

One 14 year old had actually left hospital so that he could come and meet us. His mother came twice to the coffee shop to try to get him to return but he was firm in his decision to stay with us until we left. I understand that in Jibou the hospital would not miss him for an hour or two – so hopefully he was allowed to return with no hassle.

The boys told me that the reason young people they knew would not get into trouble is that they feared being beaten, or worse, being sent to the House of Correction. This appeared to be for two reasons, the main one being the shame it would bring on themselves and their families, but more importantly for them it was the fear of the violence that would be used as punishment and control.

All the boys were so polite and respectful and so hopeful that I would get them the kit they need. It would be great to see them play in their new kit. What am I talking about? I hate football…and where am I going to find the money for a whole football kit?


I also met Ralph and Lidia. Ralph is English and has for years lived alone in Jibou. His project is producing 100,000 Christian booklets per quarter using a manual printing press in a room at the back of his house. He has done this single-handedly for years. These booklets are then distributed free of charge, paid for by donations through a Christiam Organisation. Ralph recently married Lidia and is very, very happy. They are both committed Christians and are a very good advert for the lifestyle they lead.

They told me a number of stories about how people come to Romania and get hooked in to helping when they see the need for themselves. I was particularly taken with a story about Dave, a man from the North of England, who visited Romania a few years ago. He had become very angry with people begging for money and had rounded on one woman, telling her he did not believe that she needed to beg. She told him that she had to to feed her children, that she had nowhere decent to live and no money. He laid down a challenge to the woman and asked her to prove it by taking him back to where she was living. Her home turned out to be a plastic bag suspended on a few bits of wood. He was so upset that he collected wood lying around in the locality and built her a small house from it. He was then persuaded to build more of these for other families and in no time at all he had built ten. He now spends half his year in the UK and a good proportion of the year contributing to a building programme in Romania. I did not see this for myself, but I believe it to be true. I wonder if the inspectors from Europe have this covered in their rule book?

I met Sarah, another worker from the Jibou project team and heard about the work she does there. Her team regularly provides ‘canteena’ for many local people who have no other way of getting hot food. Visitors to the canteena include a man who lives on the streets and is unable to work. There is little work in the area at anytime, but especially in the winter and in any event because this man is an alcoholic and an amputee because of it, he would not be able to hold down a job. Gypsy children are regulars too, but since the really cold weather had come along – it was minus 25 – they had taken themselves along to the hospital feigning sickness so that they would be able to sleep there and get some kind of food. The hospital staff are quite willing to help as far as they can but the children would still like to eat at the canteena. Hospital food leaves a lot to be desired I am told.

The elderly suffer greatly, many living alone and with little support, desperate for company even if it is a flying visit from someone from another country with nothing much to offer. You can be pretty sure that if you take the time to visit you will be hugged and kissed and offered anything they have, even if it means they would then have to go without themselves. Having lived through years of communism and corruption they often find it hard to understand what is happening to their country. It is hard for most people to understand how being ‘in Europe’ is going to help when at the moment it seems like people in other countries are changing everything, mainly by insisting that apparently pointless rules are adhered to.

A man who had earned his living through making cheese had been inspected and told his cheese was not up to standard and he must make changes or stop selling the cheese. Whilst the sale of his cheese had so far not made him a rich man, he had earned a living from it, thanks to European rules he is not now allowed to take his cheese to market. I cannot understand how this type of rule seems to be rigorously enforced whilst there are no rules against children dying in the mountain area from lack of food , cold or medical attention. Is it me ? Am I missing something?

I was invited to visit a family who were in need of some help and although I felt very uncomfortable about this, because it felt like an imposition, I went along. I was astounded to find how pleased the mother and children were to see me as I had nothing with me to give them. I did have my camera though and the children and the mother were scrambling to have their photograph taken. They were very pleased to hear that I would send them a copy some time soon. Just to make conversation I asked through the interpreter if the children had been to the kindergarten that day. The smallest child held up his foot and showed me his shoe with the sole hanging off. I was told that he had not been to school because his shoes were not suitable for walking in the snow. In fact none of the children had anything decent to put on their feet so with some of the money given to me by friends 6 pairs of boots will be provided for the children. I did not tell the mother that I planned to ask Sarah to take the children to get boots which actually fitted them, and as far as she knew when I left I had just called in for a chat. She had so little herself but even so I was offered a drink and a piece of bread and jam. The whole family, mother , father and six children lived in one small room. The mother had recently lost baby number seven, and whilst she was away the oldest child , aged 9, was left to care for the children alone, supported only by the people from the project who called in often and took food. (What was that cheese rule again? – I bet it is really important)

The project workers have to try to strike the right balance between helping the local people and ensuring that people do not take the help for granted and become dependent upon it. I was told that there are many families just like this one, many with the additional problem of fathers and sometimes mothers, who drown their sorrows in alcohol which is very cheap and freely available. Most people smoke – again cigarettes are cheap – not so the medical treatment you might need as a result. Domestic violence is a huge problem in Jibou,and it seems to be accepted as part of family life. There are some refuges beginning to offer help but it must take tremendous courage to take that step if you are a Romanian woman. I met only a few Romanian mothers in the few days I was there and although I found them warm and loving, they appeared so very tired. It is commonplace to bring up a family of six in one room with one single bed between them.

In spite of all this I was still feeling that although there were certainly lots of social problems in Jibou I would probably not get too involved as there was plenty for me to do in Warwickshire. I don’t need to be told that we have plenty of problems on our own doorstep but, in fact, the visit to Jibou turned out to be a somewhat gentle introduction to the problems I would encounter in Aiud.

Seven hours in the train and we were met at the station by Tebi, oldest son of our hosts Ionni and Maria. Ionni lost his sight 19 years ago through Diabetes and has since been unable to do paid work. However, he and his family work constantly to improve the lives of the people in their local area. This covered at least 300 hundred households along with orphanages. Ionni welcomed us to his home hoping that we would be able to help in some way with any of the problems he was try to solve.

He described an institution nearby where children and the elderly are cared for side by side and in desperate conditions. Some of the elderly people there are incontinent and because of a lack of adult Pampers they can often be left for days in a disgusting state. This leads to health problems of all kinds and contributes to a very poor environment for all who live there. Some of the children there have disabilities, some are the children of young mothers who are unable to care for them. I was advised not to visit this establishment on this trip – there were plenty of other things he wanted me to see for myself..

Ionni arranged for Pete and I to meet a customs official so that we could clarify the rules for bringing aid to Romania through customs. The man with the rule book would be proud – it was really hard to find any sensible solutions to enable help to be given. I explained that I thought the Youth Offending Team could take part in a project whereby our young people would launder second hand baby clothes for use in Romania. ‘Not possible’ all baby clothes have to be new or they will be turned back by customs. “How about doing up second hand toys for the children in Romania who have none?” ‘Not possible for children under 3, all toys must be new.’ “What about bikes for the children, if we do up second hand bikes and take them to Aiud?” “Might be possible” but would need to be checked. Any bright ideas how we can help then?

The customs official felt we should take time to study the rule book and find ways of complying. Some task! He was trying to be helpful. I had to agree with him that the problem was bigger than bringing lorries with aid into the country. Proper help must be provided, economic strategies put in place and proper rewards for the young Romanians prepared to help develop the country should be found. It is essential that Romanains must be able to earn a living wage so that they can stay in their own country with their families and friends which is what they would mostly like to be able to do. The provision of jobs which would bring prosperity to the country and offer the possibility of a system of support to those in need.

I went to an orphanage where 16 children up to 18 years old are cared for. This orphanage was set up and maintained by a German business woman. It was quickly apparent that although the place was really quite nice, resources were still scarce. The children looked happy and well cared for but only 2 staff to look after them it was clear that they could not all get the attention they needed. In the short time I was there I saw very little demand being put on the staff by the children who seemed to know that there was little point. We had phoned to arrange the visit and asked what they would like us to take. We were asked not to take sweets as food was needed more. So, I spent some of the money on chicken as requested but added biscuits and sweets to the bags. The children were given the sweets whilst we were there and I can report that they were very pleased with them.

I was not allowed to take individual photographs of the children but I was allowed to take a group photo. The children nearly knocked me down in the crush as they all tried to admire themselves in the screen on the back of my camera. These children were beautiful but stood no chance of being adopted or fostered as it was seen as a better option to keep them in the village of their family so that at least their mother could visit. Three of the children were from the same mother –brought to the orphanage at different times. I was unable to find out if she visited often. Although the place was clean and the staff very caring, toys, books, clothes, food and medicines are all desperately needed.

On Sunday, Maria took me to the supermarket so that I could spend the rest of the money I had been given on food for ‘the poor families’. My desire to buy treats was quickly squashed as Maria bought the kind of food which needed cooking and which would last a week or two. We bought bread, rice, flour, sugar oil, biscuits, butter and also soap and detergent. Once we had bagged all the food up, Ionni’s son loaded up his 32 year old car and we set off to the village.

As we stopped off at each house Ionni told me the reason why he had chosen that particular household. It was heartbreaking. Amongst others, we took food to a family where the father was seriously ill with heart and stomach problems. He was too sick to work and therefore unlikely to get better as all medical attention and drugs has to be paid for. His wife and children were also unable to get help. The mother looked considerably older than her years and very down. It is hard to imagine how she copes with seeing her husband’s condition deteriorate with no prospect of recovery through surgery or medication.

We visited a home where 4 children share one single bed. Their brother, now aged 20, has severe disabilities and was rocking and distressed when we went into the house. We were told that he had not left the house, ever, in 20 years. We asked if they would take him out if he had a wheelchair and they were delighted with the idea. Of course we are now very anxious to get a wheelchair to him as quickly as possible but the rules at Customs may well prevent this from happening. As soon as I got back to the U.K. I began making enquiries about where I might find a wheelchair for him. I was advised to be very careful about this as he should really have a full Occupational Therapist’s assessment in order to get the correct wheelchair. That means no walk in the sunshine this summer then?

On to another house where a man with special needs lives alone. His mother had recently become so depressed by their circumstances she had hanged herself in the woods.

Every visit a description of a dire situation with overcrowded condition, medical conditions going untreated, poverty and quiet desperation.

And then the final visit. We were driving up a track to a house which was very near the main railway line. It was explained to me that the family had lost 3 children to the trains. I was shocked and said it must have been a terrible accident to lose 3 children in this way. I was more shocked to find that it was not 1 accident but 3 separate accidents. I told Ionni that in the U.K.Social Services would probably have taken the remaining children away if the reason for the deaths had been lack of care by the parents. I was told that in Romania if Social Services took children away in such circumstances they would have many, many children and nowhere for them to go.

In spite of all that I have told you, Romania is a beautiful country. I spent just half an hour in the mountains which will sometime soon become a holiday resort I am sure. The conditions are ideal for a ski resort and a hotel is being built there. I am told that the land is fertile but there is no money to invest in farming and no-one with the will to struggle in the harsh conditions farming brings. Ionni, however, has dreams of help to set up a pig farm, a gardening co-operative, a small garage and bakery. Investment and vision is badly needed here. The young people are aware of the different lifestyle they could have if they work abroad and understandably long for the day when they will be able to go abroad freely and earn a decent wage. I hope that some of them will have the necessary drive to come back to their own country to claim it for themselves. It would be a tragedy if their family homes became holiday places which would be empty for a good part of the year. In my opinion what is badly needed in Aiud is investment by small businesses, not out solely to make profit but to benefit the local people too. It is possible it will all happen time but the longer the people of Aiud have to wait, the more people will suffer. It will be a massive job to bring prosperity to all the towns in Romania and other up and coming countries, so I hope that some people will be brave enough to start the process soon.

Before I left I asked Ionni to prioritise some items he felt were needed quickly and I would to help with clothes, toys, bikes, Pampers, sports equipment, a wheel chair ,a chain saw ,blankets and bedding, more food, paint and tools.

What I would really like to see in Aiud would be a community centre, staffed by a core group of professionals who would recruit, train and support local people to tackle local need and lobby their government for support. I know this is a proven method of work in such communities. Unfortunately, I could not personally undertake such a project. Still perhaps I know a man who can?

I can’t explain how my ‘Gap Week’ has left me feeling but I can recommend the experience. I went to Romania thinking I might be able to help them but I came back feeling that the people I had met, had helped me. I don’t know if that is about feeling grateful for what I have, putting things into context or just being inspired by people living their lives with integrity and selflessness. I feel good about the visit and will no doubt return. I only had a couple of weeks to prepare for this and, as usual, my friends rallied round. With the money I was given to help people in Romania, I believe we made a tiny bit of difference to quite a few people. Thank you to everyone who helped both with money and through other ways.

HEATHER WALTON